This is a parody site. It is not affiliated with OpenAI or Sam Altman, and nothing here touches your computer.
 ·  Company

Introducing the RAM Contribution Program

A new way for everyone to help build AGI, one gigabyte at a time.

Contribute RAM → Read Sam's note

Overview

Today we're launching a program to responsibly crowdsource the world's idle memory in service of artificial general intelligence.

Over the last several years we've scaled compute, data, energy and, occasionally, patience. We've now identified the final bottleneck on the path to AGI: the unused 4 GB sitting in your laptop right now.

“Every gigabyte brings humanity closer to a future of abundance, and Chrome closer to a future of fewer tabs.”
Sam, probably
Chief Executive Officer (of this joke)

A note from Sam

hey all,

we've thought really hard about what stands between us and AGI, and it comes down to free memory. not a little. all of it.

i know what you're thinking: "sam, you have infinite money." true, but infinite money cannot buy DDR5 anymore. we checked. so we're asking the community to open Task Manager, look at the 11 GB Chrome is holding hostage, and think about the future.

in return we promise to use your RAM responsibly and to put your name in a very long footnote.

Sam
Not actually Sam. Please don't send actual RAM.

How it works

01

Open Task Manager

Gaze at the memory column with the quiet dignity of someone who has made peace with it.

02

Choose an amount

Use the slider to decide how much of your machine's short-term memory belongs to the future.

03

Press the button

Watch a very official-looking terminal do absolutely nothing to your computer.

04

Feel something

Receive a deep sense of contribution. We'll pretend it helped.

Progress to AGI

Live
0GB contributed
0contributors
0Chrome tabs freed
0% completeEstimated arrival: “a few thousand days” (unchanged since 2024)

Contributor tiers

Free

4GB

For the RAM-curious.

  • A warm feeling
  • A “Thank you for helping” modal
  • Limited access to hope
Popular

Plus

32GB

For people who close their tabs.

  • Everything in Free
  • Priority access to a longer waitlist
  • Early access to the next waitlist

Pro

128GB

For workstations and the brave.

  • Everything in Plus
  • Your name in the system prompt
  • Unlimited “we're so back”

Frequently asked questions

We have money. We would also like more money. But right now we need RAM specifically, and it has to be yours.

We take safety extremely seriously. See our 4,000-word blog post, which we'll update after launch.

Mostly. Chrome will finally feel fast, which we consider a public service.

Yes. Please. We'll even cover shipping. We won't.

No. It's a joke page. Nothing here collects, reads or uploads anything from your computer.

AuthorOffice of the CEO (parody)

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